All in all though, there were many interesting tidbits throughout the day that I observed and tried to take mental notes of to tell my husband on the phone later tonight.  For example:

- Realizing the awkwardness of sitting next to a nice older guy on the plane who really wants to chat about his daughter and grandkids and whatnot, but is hard of hearing…Do I try to end the difficult conversation for the sake of simplicity?  Or do I continue to holler my responses two or three times?

- How awesome it was to be able to switch to the emergency exit aisle and get all that fantastic leg room

- However, the leg room did not exactly cancel out the fact that I forgot my neck pillow thingy or the 3 year old behind me constantly kicking my seat, or the poor infant that could not fall asleep and was so sad and grumpy because of it.  So, roomy?  Yes.  Relaxing?  No.

- SkyMall, as always, was awesome.

- The fact that I was able to connect to Wi-Fi while the plane was in the air blew my mind. I mean, internet access miles above the ground while moving hundreds of miles an hour?  AMAZING.  Does that make me sound like I’m 75?

- The night before I left I was very anxious and I suddenly had this vivid image of the fact that I would be in this big metal cylinder with wings that is somehow hurtling through the sky and depositing me on the other side of the country, and looking at it in such literal terms FREAKED me out.  I mean, really, flying?  It’s insanity.  Now do I sound like I was born in 1810 or something?  Needless to say, I was very relieved when I arrived at my destination safe and sound.

- It is gloriously warm here in Florida.  I stepped off the plane and was embraced by the warmth and humidity and was practically smacked between the eyes with the realization of how badly I needed a VACATION, not a stinking business trip.  The only other times I’ve been to Florida before have been with my husband, and feeling the lovely vaction-y climate without my man reminded me of how things just aren’t as fun when he isn’t around.  (And when I’m working, naturally. Blah.)

- Speaking of relieved…this hotel is actually a normal hotel in a normal location near restaurants and convenience stores where actual normal people are, unlike my previous business trips in the ghetto.  It’s nice to see valid business without bars on the windows and gaggles of homeless people around them, you know?

- Leaving Utah is always a culture shock.  Seriously, as much as I love my beautiful home state, it’s kind of a weird place due to the crazy lack of diversity.  It was kind of neat to see a kosher restaurant full of faithful Jewish men in yarmulkes, right next door to a bar.  I don’t know what would be more unlikely in good old Utah County- a kosher restaurant or a bar in a strip mall?

- The guy checking me into the hotel told me I had beautiful hair and then instantly blushed and said he could get fired for saying that, but I told him I wouldn’t tell.  Kind of made my whole night considering I felt like something that had been dragged across the country and was now a heap of smudged make-up and puffy eyes.

- One of the restaurants in the little strip mall by the hotel is a fast food Chinese joint called “Run & Run”, which pretty much seems like the most perfect name ever considering fast food Chinese will probably give you the runs.  Heh.

Oy, I have a very VERY long day tomorrow and I am up past my bedtime.  I should probably call it a night.  Business trips are the best time for nonsensical ramblings on the internet, don’t you think?  If you’re lucky I will return for more tomorrow.  I know you can’t wait.

Somebody make me stop using the PhotoBooth application on my computer.  I need an intervention.  No one wants to see badly lit photos of a a lonely, puffy-faced traveler, I know this.  I just can’t help myself.

Anyway, you know what one of the best parts of flying on an airplane is?  No, not the TSA patdown.  SKYMALL.  Oh yeah, you heard me right.  I love flipping through the SkyMall catalog.  I can kill a good hour being simultaneously intrigued and amused by that thing.

Let’s take a look at some of the gems found in this fine publication, shall we?

Exhibit A-  The Pet Wheel-Away.  True, your pet has 4 legs, compared to your 2 that end in high heels, but he probably deserves to be wheeled around in a mesh cage rather than walking on his own.  Only $120!

Exhibit B- The Hidden Litter Box.  Listen, I don’t mean to pick on somebody with limitations, but clearly this inventor does not have a sense of smell.  There’s a reason litter boxes are kept in basements/laundry rooms/garages instead of your living room.  They stink.  And your book club guests are not going to be impressed seeing your cat smugly saunter out after chucking around litter.

Exhibit C- Private iPhone Case.  As described on the website, The private iPhone case is a great way to discreetly watch a movie or read sensitive emails with others sitting nearby. Because simply moving to a more private area to do such things would be totally weird.

Exhibit D- Personalized Steak Branding Iron.  I…I…I have nothing to say.  I just know if my neighbor served me a steak with his initials branded on it I’d be seriously creeped out.

Exhibit E- Head Spa Massager.  Apparently this contraption massages your head like “thousands of tiny fingers”, but I want this sucker simply so I can look like I’m FROM THE FUTURE.

And last but not least…

Exhibit F- Bigfoot Garden Yeti Sculpture.  Are you tired of doing your darndest to keep up with the Joneses, only to continually fall short?  This Bigfoot sculpture will blow their stupid garden gnomes out of the water.  And would you believe it?  This stunning bronze statue is cheaper than that dumb pet rolling carrier, and that’s no joke.

Carnival has issued apologies to the travelers, issued refunds including travel costs, and given a free cruise to use in the future.  All in all, the cruise line handled the bad situation wonderfully.

Having been on two enjoyable and thankfully uneventful cruises before, I can definitely see how an experience like this would be awful.  You’re all hyped up for this great vacation, and bam!  No vacation.  If you had a cabin without windows that would be pretty sucky.  And the non-flushing toilets?  Oh yuck, don’t make me think about it too much or I might gag.

But…really?  Is it really necessary for the media to hype up this experience so much?  Yeah, I get it.  It was not remotely fun for the passengers.  People had to tolerate some situations they aren’t used to.  I know I certainly wouldn’t be happy about it.

But there are people all around the world suffering far worse situations.  People who live in huts with dirt floors, who have to walk miles to fetch water every day.  People who have never had a toilet in their home.  People who have no access to health care or nutritious foods.

There are people living in war zones, with power knocked out for weeks on end and raw sewage running down the streets.  People who have to live in fear daily that a missile is going to land on their home or that corrupt soldiers will drag them into the streets and beat them.

That’s a nightmare.

Yeah, the passengers on this ship had to live on less-than-appetizing cold sandwiches for a few days.  As one woman in an article griped, “ We have not had a hot cup of coffee in four days.”  Excuse me as I take a second to pick up my eyeballs, they rolled so hard they popped right out of my head. I kind of sympathize with the passengers, but they are safe, the ordeal was brief, and they are getting a refund and a free cruise out of it.  If you ask me, no real harm done.

I hate how the media sensationalizes these types of things.  This was not a disaster. You know reporters are all up in the passengers’ faces.  “Tell us your story!  Was it awful?  How horrific was it?” Meanwhile, the details of families suffering- true suffering- in war-torn countries are censored or ignored completely.

I’m glad the cruise ship passengers made it home safely and quickly.  But let’s all try to keep a little bit of perspective in the future.

Now its back to the daily grind.  I’m trying to muster up some enthusiasm but am having a tough time.  After seeing the beautiful sights of St. Martin, St. Thomas, and Grand Turk, it’s hard to return to the drab routine.  Don’t get me wrong, I am happy to be home.  But I miss the color of life in the Caribbean.  The vibrant greens and blues and pinks and oranges.  Sometimes I feel my life here is so…gray.  Gray winter outside.  Gray townhomes.  Gray carpet and cubicle walls at work.  Blah…..

We’ve been Googling job opportunities and housing in St. Thomas since we got back.  Maybe it will become a reality someday…?